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Trader Jakes – Issue 780 April 6, 2018

“In God we trust” Page 5

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FIGHTING NUNS!

A convent in Italy is being shut down after a fight between its last

three remaining nuns.The Mother Superior ended up in hospital with

scratches to her face after the fight between the sisters of the Santa

Clara convent in Bari.Now the local archbishop has intervened and

asked the Vatican for permission to close the convent, reports the

BBC.But Sister Liliana, the only nun still there, says she has no inten-

tion of leaving her home of the past 44 years. The Clarissa nuns are

regarded as the most austere order of the Roman Catholic Church,

devoted to a life of prayer, penance and quiet contemplation.But sis-

ters Annamaria and Gianbattista say they were driven to distraction

by the habits of their Mother Superior.They became so angry that

during the summer, they turned on Sister Liliana scratching her face

and throwing her to the ground.The two nuns have now moved into

a nearby convent leaving Sister Liliana barricaded inside.Archbishop

Giovanni Battista Pichierri wrote to the Vatican asking for permis-

sion to close the convent down.But Sister Liliana is not going with-

out a fight. She has not once left the nunnery in 44 years and has

written to the Pope telling him she will only leave when God decides

it is time to go.

TATTOO UNLUCKY FOR WORDS

A South Wales man got a life-size tattoo of his partner's face on his

back - only to be dumped for a younger man.Alan Jenkins, 38, from

Port Talbot, spent 20 hours under the needle to celebrate 15 happy

years with common law wife Lisa Crooks, 36.But the steelworker

was left reeling when he discovered the mum of his two kids was

having an affair with a workmate, reports The Sun.Lisa is now plan-

ning on moving Latvian Kaspars Gavars, 25, into the family home,

after Alan moves out.Alan had spent £870 on the portrait of Lisa with

their daughters Jade, 15, and Daniella,

ten.He

said: "She'll be on my

back forever, thanks to the tattoo. It was my way of telling her our

love would last forever."Lisa said: "I never wanted Alan to have my

face tattooed on his back in the first place. I didn't plan to fall in love

with Kaspars, it just happened."But Alan has no plans to get it

removed, as the laser surgery will cost thousands of

pounds.He

added: "It will be there for good, even if I meet someone else. I've

got some room on my chest if I get hooked up with someone again."

FEELIN’ NO PAIN

On Saturday, police broke up a disturbance between a couple argu-

ing over which one was drunker. Both were arrested and taken to

Overlake Hospital for treatment of injuries to their headsThe police

are charging them with disorderly conduct and disturbing the peace,

but not assault.They each injured themselves and not the

other.It

seems, according to police and witnesses, that the couple were tak-

ing turns bashing their heads into the drywall walls and the wooden

door of their apartment in order to prove they were so drunk that

they couldn't feel the pain.